For the first week of August, I had the pleasure of working at the MetroNY teen and young adult camp, Pinecrest. It was such a joy to be with so many thoughtful, open, and discerning people. It was also pretty cool that while I was there, I made new friends (which is kind of a rare treat in adulthood). This whole week, we talked about vulnerability and courage in the face of fear and uncertainty. We wrestled with tough topics like advocacy, social justice, relational leadership vs transactional ones, forgiveness, and letting go.
I made a promise to myself that, while I was there, I would try to embody the lessons I’d hope to learn, not just to sit, talk, and listen, but find ways to be courageous. So, I took long walks by myself in the woods.
Now, for context, you need to know that one of my biggest fears is being eaten alive by some wild animal who takes one look at my small, statured frame and thinks, “she looks like a tasty snack.” They would not be wrong in their thinking, but I don’t like the idea of being eaten by a bear, so going out alone into some unknown wooded territory takes courage for me. So, I did it almost every day (some days required a good nap instead).
There were a few trails at this campsite, and I tried to walk a new one each day. Still, each time I reached the opening, I would put in my AirPods and listen to a song that I couldn’t resist dancing to, and dance my way onto the trail until I felt the fear leaving my body and excitement taking over. Now I know, it's probably not smart to listen to music if you're trying to listen out for the scary bears, but sometimes a dance party all by yourself gives way to a brave heart. And I also recommend letting that dance party turn into a quick break in the middle of the trail, with only the trees and hiding creatures to witness. Each time, I went a little further. Each time, I felt a bit freer. And each time I could feel what courage felt like in my body, and I have to tell you, my heart felt fuller and my chest felt wide open, especially when I reached the end of the trail, accomplished and alive.
So please enjoy this video as a tribute to my courage.
Peace,
TJay
